To refurnish a library or not to refurnish a library....

It was somewhat chaotic in the library after my substitute had tried to take care of it. Especially in the corner with the corner settee. But I have now moved it, and the hooligans with their hangarounds that had decided that corner where it started out standing was theirs... Well, they have to think again. There's no furntiture in any corner now. Because if you're in a corner, you are out of the eyes of all the adults... Not a good thing in a library.

Now though the corner settee and another couch is standing in the middle of the lbirary. I have another couch as well, but I've had to put that one away for now. Fingers crossed I get it back out at somepoint in the future.

Because now the hooligans and their hangarounds are not that much in the library as they were before. Apparently it's not as 'fun' when your teachers and other adults see you and drag you to class. *cough* ;-)

It's still a bit loud and sometimes chaotic still, but it's a lot less now. So awesome!

All this chaos and the refurnishing and stll a bit of chaos... It's tiring, so when I get home I got no energy what so ever. :-P Which is a shame.

It doesn't help that we got a new bus-company in this town and they fucking fail. I'm so pissed off.

I used to be able to take another bus to work, that went another shorter way to the school I work and passed the hospital after that. Didn't go downtown to the city centre and the main bus station, but only went that shorter route. And that bus was only during the morning and during the afternoon, that is when people went to work and when people wanted to go home.

It was PERFECT! And it only took me 8 mins to go to and from work.

Now though? The new bus company decided that ALL buses has go through the main bus station down town... which means I'll have to change bus, go a longer way and it instead takes me 20-30 mins to go to work, depending on traffic...

I'm so pissed off about this, you have no idea. This means that I am late nearly every day, which also means I have to stay longer at work which in turn means less time with Alexandra and Peting...

I've called to complain to the bus company and been told I'm not the only one to do so but that they can't do anything. (Bullshit.) And now I'm working on a letter to the newspaper hoping it'll be printed IN the newspaper... Fingers crossed. Because it all just sucks. :-/

This entry is crossposted between LJ and DW. Comment where you are comfortable.

Beyond happy I don't have a Failbook account. Never had one, never will I get one. :-P

Facebook is evil? Yes.

And more about it.

And even more still!

All three well worth reading.

Ugh... I remember when everyone wanted you to have a Failbook. I got several emails a week from friends wanting me to join, especially my young LARP-friends. Until I told them to fucking stop sending me that shit! A little kinder maybe, but not much. They know me though, so they stopped it and are still friends of mine. :-)

This entry is crossposted between LJ and DW. Comment where you are comfortable.

I am in SO MUCH PAIN! X-/ Equal relationship we are not.

How a laundry day goes:

peting73 throws first two loads in the washing machine when he gets home from work, then goes to daycare to pick up Alexandra. Plays with her and eats a fruit, then changes the loads in the washing maching, getting two more loads going. Cooks late dinner. I get home, help with dinner. I take care of the cats litterbox. Peting puts Alexandra to bed, then goes to computer. I take care of all dishes. I prepare my breakfast for the morning. I pick up any mess. I go down to get all the laundry, fold it and put it away. All of it. And today I baked muffins to bring to work on Friday. It's now 11pm and I just NOW got to sit down.

Did I mention my hip hurts like hell? *grumpy* I seem to get stuck doing the bigger parts of the household work, and I'm the one that gets home at the latest!

This entry is crossposted between LJ and DW. Comment where you are comfortable.

And here I thought I’d have energy enough to actually update my LJ. Apparently not. *sigh*

And I’ll tell you exactly why I haven’t had any energy and why I’ve been so absent. :-P

So I got a new job, right? Started in April. And to start with it all felt good. Yeah, so I worked ten hours on Mondays, 8am to 6:15pm. And three hours one Saturday a month. But that was fine, because the rest was OK.

But that was because my predecessor had finished off as much as possible.

Then summer came and went, and you all know how busy I was then. All good stuff, but rest? I had none.

And to make matters worse the night between Sunday and Monday, the day before work, Alexandra decided to have a grand performance. And stayed up from 00:30am to 5am. Which left me with only two hours of sleep, and peting73 only three. Night before going back to work. And my first day? Ten hours.

I was not all there, let me tell you…

And the first thing we did, boss and I, after the Monday meeting was to plan all months from August until December with all the dates and hours I was to be at all them schools.

Oh, and to make it even more brilliant. Instead of being responsible for 6 schools, like my predecessor, I am responsible for 8 schools.

Great.

And once we were done planning and I saw my schedule, I panicked. No joke. Yeah, sure. I only do activities ONCE in each class on all them schools. But that’s 8 schools, people!!! Whatever I do, I have to do it AT LEAST 8 times, most likely more. Ugh.

One thing stressed me out the more, and that’s the activity called “booktalks”. What you do then is you bring a pile of books to the class you visit and you talk about the books, what they’re about and why they are so great and why you should read them and why it’s important to read. Basically. Which also means… You have to read a couple of them books….

Yeah…

I have booktalks for grade 3, 4, 5 and 6. In each school. That’s a lot of books. And a lot of books that I’m supposed to read. Cue stressed out. Thank heavens awesome boss helped me find suitable books for each class and dividing them up between schools and classes.

I refuse to do work when I’m not at work, which means I somehow have to find time to read books when I’m at work. Not easy, near impossible. And when I don’t feel like reading, it’s really hard. Even if it is my job.

And to make matters even more fun, during all of August and much of September, much of my time was consumed by the feast given to those kids who managed the challenge The Summer Book Club where they had to read at least 6 books during the summer. As a reward they got a feast. And since I’m a school librarian, I was involved in arranging this feast. And since I’m the newest hired, my other two colleagues took most of the responsibility. My job was to keep in touch with the magician that we’d hired (no problem! cool guy!) and to keep in touch with the janitor off the premise we’d hired (hard to catch on phone, but then no problem).

So no problem, right? Wrong.

See, one of my colleagues are badly burnt out. No kidding. And during this time it got painfully obvious. She barely managed to do what she had on her plate. And me and my other colleague had to remind her constantly.

My other colleague? She quite. She got another job, and then was just gone. Within a week. Boss knew about it, but shit. Not a good timing. Now it was just me and burnt out colleague. And she is incapable of taking any responsibility.

So I ended up responsible for the whole thing.

I did not have fun. Thank heavens I’ve been responsible for crazy shit when I was active in the Sexmasters* at the Student Union Pub, just saying! Because I channeled my wicked Sexmaster personality and turned boss of hell on her ass… *grump* If I hadn’t, things would not have ended up well. Colleague that had quite was there anyway, because the kids knew her and missed her. But she had no clue what to do either. Only me.

I don’t know how, but the party ended up a success. Much thanks to the magician Reggie Simon, I believe. BRILLIANT man! And an american that has moved to Sweden, so I got a bit nostalgic there. :-)

But to say I was a wreck when I came home that night would be an understatement.

So did it calm down after that? No. Hell no. Well, workload yes. A bit. I’ve gotten more comfortable with my job and I am starting to feel that I actually know my shit, unlike panicking all the time which I did during the entire time of August.

BUT! Burnt out colleague… Ho boy… While I got all the schools on the countryside here, she got all the daycare centers. And the responsibility for the art showroom the library have.

And she can’t do it. I’ve seen some of the stuff she’s sent out to parents and employees and newspapers and I’m just… It’s beyond unprofessional, and that’s coming from ME that really is not very professional to start with.

She forgets information to the artists that shows their art in the art showroom (which forced me to stay one HOUR longer than I should have the other night so I could fix that). She sends the wrong information to the newspapers. She forgets when she’s supposed to be at work. She sends what time of day she’s to visit daycare centers, but not what date… She puts books in the wrong place. She loses books. She promises patrons, daycare centers and schools things she shouldn’t, since she can’t do whatever it is and the rest of us don’t have time to.

It’s just one thing after another. Unending. And who gets to clean up her mess? Me and my other awesome colleague and my awesome boss. I’ve worked here since April, and the longer I’m here the more shit I see that she’s made a total mess off. My awesome colleague has been here for 10 years (older rocker guy with nearly no filter, I love working with him) and is so feed up with everything it’s not even funny. And my boss, who hasn’t been here quite as long (and really got no filter either while being an awesome leader, I love working with her to), is so stressed out I fear she’ll burn out badly to…

It’s just an extremely bad situation all around.

We’ve tried to contain it so the patrons won’t notice too much. But now it has becoming harder and harder to do so. Burnt out colleague has some hours in the information desk, but she can’t even do that these days, since the patrons flat out says she’s to confused and they don’t feel they get the help they want.

It’s annoying, stressful, frustrating and beyond all, sad. So fucking sad.

Because burnt out colleague? She was my boss on my very first library job I got at a school library. And back then she was in total control even though she worked way to hard and way to long hours. And we had SUCH a good time working together then, and she taught me so much.

Just to end up like this. It’s so heartbreakingly sad to see in the midst of the stress and frustration.

Anyway, so yeah… That would be the reason why I’ve been absent. I’m just stressed out as fuck, and try to hang on and concentrate on my job with 8 schools and the bookvan once a week.

I have this job until December 31st, so I’m hanging on until then. Not sure I want to keep this job if I’m offered, to be quite honest…




*Still got NOTHING to do with sex. To sexa is an old swedish word that means to party. So it basically stands for partymasters with a bit of an innadu.

This entry is crossposted between LJ and DW. Comment where you are comfortable.

Oh gawd. Where to even begin with this clusterfuck of insanity that went down this weekend? Let’s see if I can. And, unless they are too personal, I will try and answer any questions in the comments.

This might be a little bit triggering, so a little warning for that.

Remember my friend that committed suicide? That I’ve mourned since July? Well. Turns out, she never did. She’s not dead.

I found this out Friday. A DM on Twitter was sent to me with a link to an LJ-post where this person had dug out the truth about the fact that my friend had faked her own suicide.

At that point, I wasn’t sure, since my friend and her had their on and off friendship, and they were on and off enemies. So I couldn’t be sure of anything at that point. I was, however, hurt to see myself being discussed in the comments. (Just to later see that the frienenimy had made a post where I was discussed…)

Because, like it or not… I did like my friend. We had a lot of fun together. I supported her through anxiety attacks, talked her out of it when her paranoia went highwire, we talked about her kid and mine, she supported me when I went through IVF to get Alexandra, we roleplayed (so much!), we fangirled, we sent letters and photos to each other, christmas-cards, birthday cards… We had a lot of fun! And it wasn’t just through chatt, we talked through Skype and called each other on the phone to.

And I was my crazy honest blunt person with her to. Wasn’t like I walked around on eggshells when talking to her, if anyone would believe that. Still, she said herself that she saw me as her best friend. She liked my honesty and bluntness and often asked for it to.

Anyway, so after I’d seen that LJ-post, I got an email. From my friend. Just a few mins after I’d read that LJ-post (and commented on it). Two emails even. And second later, a message on my IM. Just to hit the shock home, or I don’t even know.

In these emails she tried to explain why she did it. And there’s just… too much that don’t add up. And reading between the lines, which I have gotten quite good at, I can see that she don’t wanna lose me as a friend.

I just… I can’t even. How? How can I even trust her after such a thing? I feel that I don’t even know her anymore. Four years. I stood up for her, supported her, helped her for four years. And she just threw that in my face like it was worth nothing. Nothing at all.

So how come then she went through such extremes?

I have no idea. I have two sides of the story, the frienimy (friends sometimes, enemy sometimes) and hers. And to be frank, even though I don’t trust much of what my previous friend wrote me, there’s much that don’t add up from her frienemimes posts either.

And to be honest, I really don’t care. Can’t say I want anything to do with either of them.

I am so incredibly hurt right now. I don’t think I’ve been this hurt since I don’t even know when. I feel both used and abused.

I just want to curl up in a corner and hide.

Can’t have that though. The warrior viking just fights on. No stopping life from moving is it?


This entry is crossposted between LJ and DW. Comment where you are comfortable.

I don’t even know where to start with this post. To say things have been stressful lately would be an understatement.

( Stressing out about work... )

You’d think once I got home from work I could relax, right? Nope, no such thing.

( Stressing the fuck out over trip to celebrate Midsummer this weekend... )

Right, so… To make a checklist:

( Checklist of the weekend... )

I honestly have no idea how I’ll keep my sanity this weekend… :-/ *ready to collapse*

This entry is crossposted between LJ and DW. Comment where you are comfortable.

Christmas is a busy time, ain't it? :-) It sure took some time to get all them Christmas cards/packages/what have you sent off today. Much longer then I thought. But there I go for sending packages all over the world. Sucks with all the paperwork coming with it though. :-P I hope they'll be well received when they arrive. :-)

I forgot to send two off, so they'll be even later. Oh well. :-) That'll be fixed tomorrow. I hope anyway. Peting gets off work early, so maybe he can watch Alexandra while I fix that... It goes much quicker if I do errands without her after all... ;-) It is a bit of a project to get out of the house with a baby. :-)

She's been somewhat fussy during the evenings lately, and started a bad habit at waking up at around 3am for change and food... Not fun. Especially since afterwards she refuses to fall asleep. :-P Last night she woke me up at 2:45am... and then I didn't get to bed until 4:30am... o.O I have had more fun. Gladly she let me sleep until 9:30am after that, so... But still! Nights are for sleeping, baby girl! I thought we had this down already, since she has been really good and slept through the nights up until now.

Our guess though is that she is starting to get teethes... since lately she has started to drool like you wouldn't believe. In other words... Fun times ahead indeed.

Reading the Secret Santa stories that has started to be posted at TH_Fanfic. :-) I love fic-fests at that community, since they are always so well organized! HAIL ALL THE MODS! *waves* It's a lot of twincest though. And even though I do so very much try to be supportive off all writers, I just... can't with some twincest. :-P I am not a fan of it, unless the summery shows a really really interesting story idea. I do prefer the G's to be involved in some way, one or both of them. Or hell, anyone else that shows up in Tokio Hotel fanfic. Just... not twincest. Not so much my cup of tea, even if it IS the most popular pairing in the fandom. Fine for those that like it though. Be my guest. I just wish there was more of all the other pairings to balance it up. :-P I'll try to read as many twincest stories as possible, because I DO want to give my support to the writers who has worked SO HARD to get the stories done in time for the fic-fest. :-)

Anyhow, Christmas is almost upon us (oh dear) and even though I have payed for all of my christmas-gifts I haven't gotten them all yet. Because one of the guys I won two auctions from is an idiot. *head-desk*

I won the auctions 3:e of December. But I didn't hear anything from him in THREE WEEKS! o.O That is last weekend I got a mail 16th of December. Day before I had mailed him and before that I had tried to call him, using the number on his contact info. I tried this MANY TIMES, until I got the message that the number was out of order... WTF? So I figured I'd been scammed and put out the worst review ever on his profile, giving him nearly no points at all. Lowest you could give. THEN I GOT AN EMAIL! o.O Full of excuses, mostly that he'd moved and hence hadn't been able to send the stuff off... DUDE! I don't know about you, but it doesn't take me THREE WEEKS to move! And even if it takes me that long to unpack and such, I mean... If you KNOW you have auctions going, wouldn't you, you know... Put that stuff on the TOP of a box? Or in a special box even? *shakes head* The mail was just FILLED with excuses, and not a word if he'd send it to me... and he started talking about what the practice and unwritten rules are on the site... My dear sir... I am in no way obliged to follow any other rules then those written by the site. If I think you deserve shitty reviews, I will give you that. I have, however, agreed to make it a bit better if he manages to send it off so I get it in time for Christmas. I have my doubts, but if he does? I will. Unlike him, I do keep my promises. Just... what a mess. First time I've had ANY kind of problems with online auctions.

I had a TON of luck with one (I got a brand new usually VERY expensive thing for Peting for peanuts)... and I guess I had to have problems with another just to balance things, I suppose...

Righto!

Bedtime now and tomorrow! I'll wrap the gifts that have gotten here and make sure the apartment don't look like a total mess... and cuddle Alexandra, of course. ;-)

I'll leave you with some AWESOME vids to enjoy! :-D

First some drumming... You all should know how I feel about drummers, by now. I love them. And that's that. :-)

Tommy Lee of Mötley Crüe fame posted these on his Twitter some time ago. He has apparently been involved in a concert... with just drummers. :-D How awesome ain't that??? And the music is GREAT! Do give these a chance and a listen through!

( Berzerk Sizzle Reel Part One and Two )

I love watching kid drummers to! Many that show such skill at such a tender age! I just hope many of them keep it up. :-)

( Shout at the Devil (Mötley Crüe) played by a 6 year old! And he is GOOD! )

Another thing I love is Disney movies... Despite the... strange things that show up in them. :-) So this seriously made me lol! X-D

( The 4 worst lessons Disney movies thought us as kids... )

Anyone who has missed me being a cat-lover hasn't been on my LJ for very long... *lol* Anyway, here's a really cool vid with some of the most uncommon cat-breeds out there! There's a few I would love to either own or meet in real life! :-D

( Top 30 unusual cat breeds... )

And now I REALLY need to go sleep! X-D NIGHT!

This entry is crossposted between LJ and DW. Comment where you are comfortable.

Alright. Most of you know I am pretty zen about any changes done to LJ, right? So far I haven't had any problems at all with the changes done so far.

But now... I do.

I mean, I am LJ to journal... to write and read and comment and such... to actually have an interaction with people, yeah?

I do have a Tumblr to, but that is just for looking at pictures, because there you just CAN'T interact with people. At all. I don't like the layout of Tumblr at all. Neither how it works...

But now? You can have people REBLOG your posts... just like on Tumblr. If you pay for it. And the reblogger apparently gets LJ tokens... from you. (WTF?)

Oh, and now, as you saw on my post below.... they will fuck up how you read your f-list.

Now, as I said. I've been pretty zen with most changes, some of them I even liked! (Comments and Scrapbook...)

But you DO NOT fuck around with my f-list! I spend all the little time I have on the computer on my f-list... I have tweaked how I read it so it fits me...

This is the first time I am actually pissed off at LJ. :-/

LJ is LJ and Tumblr is Tumblr.

*sad and pissed*

When you get your tax-refunds you should never ever plan on what to do with it... Clearly... *grumbles*

I went away early this morning and handed in the car to the mechanic... again... And then when he called back he told me the fault... and that he couldn't fix it before Midsummer's Eve... and that it'll cost more then we'd planned. Around 7500 SEK... (around 1000 USD). FUCK! That is a HUGE chunk of the money we got on our tax-refund... Money we had planned to use for a washing machine (to make life a bit easier when Nerd Jr is born) and on a new TV (since ours have started to act wonky...)

And to make matters worse! We were told that driving long? Was a BAD idea! DOUBLE-FUCK! We had this whole plan to visit my family, my relatives, during Midsummer. I really really looked forward to it! But it is a two hour drive. No can do with car fucked up.

Instead we have to go by train... Going by train in Sweden is lovely! I do love going by train! But it costs a lot more then going by car. :-P And mom has to drive us from and to the train station... 700 SEK for train-tickets for me and peting73. More money spent. Dammit! (around 95 USD)

And we've fought with this car-trouble since this winter, dammit! Already spent about 5000 SEK on it! (Around 670 USD) So to find out today we had to spend EVEN MORE on said car is... not fun. :-/

So why not buy a new car, you might ask yourself? Well, the car we DO have is a Volvo S60 2001, so it is a very good car normally. This is the first mayor fault on it. To buy a car better then that we would have to pay almost as much as 200'000 SEK. Around 27'000 USD. Money we DEFINITELY don't have...

So it has been a day of economically woes today. :-P

To sort it? We made pie. Apple/pear pie always makes things better? Right? Right... *grumbles still*

Originally posted by steinsgrrl at CISPA is the new SOPA