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Sometimes... sometimes you need to take a bit of a step back, right? I did that the other day on social media. On LJ and DW I've done several clean ups, so it wasn't needed here. But on Twitter and Instagram, it was getting a bit ridiculous. I was following way to many accounts/people, so I had to do a serious clean up.
I mean, online stuff and social media should be for fun, right? Well, combined with the stress of work and everything else, it just added to the stress. So hence the clean up.
Work is really stressful at the end of the school term. Last day of school is on the 15th of June next week. And this whole month or a bit more actually, has been SO hectic with everything that I need to do with the kids and teens at the school. Classes I need to hold and information I need to spread. I have made it, if just, but I did. I am getting WAY way better at planning than I was when I started this work. And I feel more confidant in my role as a school librarian to, which I think has a thing to do with it to. I dare more to demand things and push more for activities I need to do. You know?
It helps, of course, that I've been allowed to go to TWO educations on the University here that my employment payed for. And it was during working hours (sort of), so that was cool!
At home it's been a bit much to, so this term I have gone down to work 7 hours a day instead of 8. It has done WONDERS for both me and Alexandra to be honest. It's just one hour a day, so it doesn't effect my paycheck that much, but it does make sure I feel less stressed and less guilty each day. :-) Win-win!
Also, it's that time of year to. The dreaded Midsummer time.
For those that have been around a while, I dread Midsummer each year. Last time I was so down I am sure I showed quite a few signs of depression.
My beloved Mr P, or Peting, has a friend who USED TO BE his best friend that he goes to visit during Midsummer each year. To him and his friend Midsummer is no big deal. It's just a few days extra off work and a reason to have a small party. So that's what they've been doing ever since I got to know them. Even after he got married and moved 8 hours away from here.
His wife was... special to say the least. I don't use the word lightly, but hysteric is a word that would actually fit her. I've visited there a few times. Last time was when Alexandra was a year. I was not doing good during that visit, let me tell you. Even worse than last year. After that, Mr P went all by himself.
But that meant, he wasn't with us. No big deal, to him. But big deal to me. Because when I grew up Midsummer was a family thing. My aunt has always and still do have this HUGE Midsummer Party the day before Midsummer Eve. Where ALL of my huge crazy extended family go to. These days were about 25-30 people there. (Including spouses and kids.) And when I grew up on Midsummer Eve, we had a smaller gathering at home. And on Midsummer Day the family went to a traditional feast area to dance and hang out.
All family things. Mr P didn't do anything like that, and I guess is not used to it. But him not being with us has effected Midsummer badly for me.
This year though, his friend, who really hasn't acted like a friend ever since he got married to that woman all those years ago, hasn't talked to him all this year. Last year I think he called twice. On his own birthday and then once more to invite Mr P to come for Midsummer. This year he did neither. Probably since he's gotten divorced and has no area to be at for any Midsummer party.
I'm sad for Mr P, he has last what he thought was his best friend. I can't help but feel happy though, because that means he'll be spending time with us. And I need that, I think. I need that very much.
We've been together since 2003 now. And sure, we've had our ups and downs. None of us are perfect. But dammit, he is mine and I am his. And want to be with him and kiddo when there's holidays and shit.
*sigh*
I guess some of the Midsummer blues has set in. :-P Even if I do look forward to it to. I'll get to visit mom, spend some really good time with her, and I do svery much look forward to that. She has retired now, 65 years old, and has taken on the project of clearing out stuff from her house. I'm actually curious to so what she's done!
Anyhow. Over and out! We'll see when I poke my head in here again. :-) Hopefully it won't take quite as long until next time. I do feel better after writing this!
This entry is cross posted between LJ and DW. Comment where you are comfortable.
I mean, online stuff and social media should be for fun, right? Well, combined with the stress of work and everything else, it just added to the stress. So hence the clean up.
Work is really stressful at the end of the school term. Last day of school is on the 15th of June next week. And this whole month or a bit more actually, has been SO hectic with everything that I need to do with the kids and teens at the school. Classes I need to hold and information I need to spread. I have made it, if just, but I did. I am getting WAY way better at planning than I was when I started this work. And I feel more confidant in my role as a school librarian to, which I think has a thing to do with it to. I dare more to demand things and push more for activities I need to do. You know?
It helps, of course, that I've been allowed to go to TWO educations on the University here that my employment payed for. And it was during working hours (sort of), so that was cool!
At home it's been a bit much to, so this term I have gone down to work 7 hours a day instead of 8. It has done WONDERS for both me and Alexandra to be honest. It's just one hour a day, so it doesn't effect my paycheck that much, but it does make sure I feel less stressed and less guilty each day. :-) Win-win!
Also, it's that time of year to. The dreaded Midsummer time.
For those that have been around a while, I dread Midsummer each year. Last time I was so down I am sure I showed quite a few signs of depression.
My beloved Mr P, or Peting, has a friend who USED TO BE his best friend that he goes to visit during Midsummer each year. To him and his friend Midsummer is no big deal. It's just a few days extra off work and a reason to have a small party. So that's what they've been doing ever since I got to know them. Even after he got married and moved 8 hours away from here.
His wife was... special to say the least. I don't use the word lightly, but hysteric is a word that would actually fit her. I've visited there a few times. Last time was when Alexandra was a year. I was not doing good during that visit, let me tell you. Even worse than last year. After that, Mr P went all by himself.
But that meant, he wasn't with us. No big deal, to him. But big deal to me. Because when I grew up Midsummer was a family thing. My aunt has always and still do have this HUGE Midsummer Party the day before Midsummer Eve. Where ALL of my huge crazy extended family go to. These days were about 25-30 people there. (Including spouses and kids.) And when I grew up on Midsummer Eve, we had a smaller gathering at home. And on Midsummer Day the family went to a traditional feast area to dance and hang out.
All family things. Mr P didn't do anything like that, and I guess is not used to it. But him not being with us has effected Midsummer badly for me.
This year though, his friend, who really hasn't acted like a friend ever since he got married to that woman all those years ago, hasn't talked to him all this year. Last year I think he called twice. On his own birthday and then once more to invite Mr P to come for Midsummer. This year he did neither. Probably since he's gotten divorced and has no area to be at for any Midsummer party.
I'm sad for Mr P, he has last what he thought was his best friend. I can't help but feel happy though, because that means he'll be spending time with us. And I need that, I think. I need that very much.
We've been together since 2003 now. And sure, we've had our ups and downs. None of us are perfect. But dammit, he is mine and I am his. And want to be with him and kiddo when there's holidays and shit.
*sigh*
I guess some of the Midsummer blues has set in. :-P Even if I do look forward to it to. I'll get to visit mom, spend some really good time with her, and I do svery much look forward to that. She has retired now, 65 years old, and has taken on the project of clearing out stuff from her house. I'm actually curious to so what she's done!
Anyhow. Over and out! We'll see when I poke my head in here again. :-) Hopefully it won't take quite as long until next time. I do feel better after writing this!
This entry is cross posted between LJ and DW. Comment where you are comfortable.
